Hmm…kinda. I don’t know. January has been…a lot.

January didn’t ease in. It kicked the door wide open, got directly in my face, and asked me, with its full chest, to be emotionally resilient about it.

I got hit with a nasty cold and a lingering cough just did not want to leave. The kind of cough where I was genuinely thinking, “If I cough this hard, will my soul leave my body? If it does, can it take the trash and laundry with it?”

And while I’ve been trying to get my lungs back online, everything around me has felt extra heavy. Loud. Tense. Like words and actions just sit in the air and refuse to move, even when you’re just trying to buy groceries and not spiral in aisle seven.

Being sick has a way of making you notice how much of life depends on other people choosing basic decency.

So as we close out what is still, amazingly, only the first month of 2026, I’m not doing “new year, new me.” I’m focused on “new year, still me, still paying attention.”

If you’re tired, and it’s not just your body, I’m right there with you.

The part that shouldn’t be controversial

I don’t love that everything gets labeled “political” the second you talk about people being treated like people. But here we are.

Here’s a small example from my own life. I can post about mobility, access, or basic courtesy, and someone will still show up to argue about whether I “really need” the accommodation. Like I’m asking for a perk instead of a way to exist in public without turning it into a not-at-all-fun obstacle course.

That’s what I mean.

People are not problems to solve.

Not if you’re disabled.
Not if your gender makes other people uncomfortable.
Not if you were born somewhere else.
Not if you speak with an accent, use mobility aids, need captions, need extra time, need help, need space.

If your first reaction to someone different is suspicion or mockery, it can feel like honesty. Phrases like “well, why don’t they just…” can feel practical. Neither one is actually honest or practical. That mindset is a lack of practice seeing other people as fully human.

What I can’t unsee right now

When the world gets tense, people start looking for someone to blame. And suddenly a lot of folks get treated like they have to prove they deserve to be here.

That really bugs me.

Not disagreement. Not debate. The way fear turns into permission. Permission to be cruel. Permission to humiliate. Permission to treat other humans like paperwork with legs.

Or just one leg. Ok, one and a half.

If you’ve never had to worry about being questioned or targeted because of who you are, it can be something that’s hard to understand. The pressure changes your whole nervous system real fast.

Dignity is not something you earn by being convenient.

Small, real actions that actually count

I’m not trying to “stay positive” in the shiny, sparkly, denial way. I’m trying to stay human.

If you want to do something that matters, it doesn’t have to be huge. It just has to be real.

Small actions are the ones you can repeat, even when you’re tired.

So here are some for real life tips.

In conversations

• Ask “What do you need?” and then listen to the answer without negotiating it.
• If you mess up someone’s pronouns or language, correct yourself and move on. Don’t make it their job to comfort you.
• We don’t have to take everything to heart, but we also don’t get to decide what bothers someone else. If a joke lands wrong, apologize, adjust, and move on. That’s making room.

In public spaces

• Leave room. LIterally. Don’t block ramps, curb cuts, or accessible seating like any of it’s optional optional.
• Don’t touch mobility aids, wheelchairs, canes, or service dogs without asking.
• If an event or business isn’t accessible, say something. Accessibility is not a special request. It’s the baseline.

At work or in groups you belong to

• Normalize captions on videos and calls. Everyone benefits.
• Stop treating accommodations like favors. They’re access.
• If you’re in charge of anything, inquire about who’s missing. Ask why they’re missing. Understand and fix what makes it hard for them to be there.

With your money and your time

• Donate if you can to causes you believe in. Even small amounts help.
• Support local orgs doing the work quietly and consistently.
• Share resources without turning it into a performance.

None of this is flashy. That’s kind of the point. Small actions are how you make a space safer without making it a whole production. Pick one thing you can do this week that makes someone’s day less hostile. Just. One. Thing.

What I’m carrying into February

February can have a turn, because January was just not it. I’m not making big promises, just carrying what I can. Nothing dramatic.

I’ll be trying to practice:

• Less pretending.
• More noticing.
• More making room.
• Smaller, real actions.
• And yes, a cough that finally gets bored and leaves.

And none of us are guaranteed a smooth path. The point of moving forward isn’t to become a better version of yourself by next Tuesday. The point is to make the world a little less cruel for the people who are already doing life on hard mode.

So I’ll end with a question.

What’s one small, real action you’re willing to take in February?

And if you don’t have an answer yet, that’s fine. Keep noticing, keep adjusting, keep going.